11/30/2008

Statue Man Meets The Cardinal

INT. ST. VINCENT CATHOLIC CHURCH – MORNING

Dan and Will stand in a line of their peers, wearing blue blazers, white khaki’s, and brown loafers. Their hands are clasped in prayer as they slowly move up the aisle toward the pulpit.

Will: Okay, Dude, remember how we practiced?
Dan: Will, I nervous, Will.
Will: There’s nothing to be nervous about.
Dan: He not my priest.
Will: I know. He’s your Cardinal.
Dan: Not mine. He a stranger.
Will: You’ll meet him up there and then he won’t be a stranger anymore. He’s here to confirm us.
Dan: Why?
Will: He has that power.
Dan: Why?
Will: Because that’s one of his functions, along with electing a new Pope.
Dan: Why?
Will: Because, in the Catholic Church, Cardinals are appointed by the Pope and the Pope is elected by the Cardinals.
Dan: Why?
Will: I don’t know. That’s just how it works. Not much of a system, really. Listen, just act religious and look serene.

Dan and Will reach the Cardinal.
Dan steps up to the plate first.
Dan notices the Cardinal is wearing a red beanie.

Dan: He Jewish? (pronounced Goo-ish)

3 comments:

Lianna said...

LMARO! That is absolutely too great of a story! I love it!

Kele said...

Too funny!!!

Tara Marie said...

Awe, I love it. Don't worry Dan, I thought the same thing as a young girl.

Here is a funny one you might like. When we moved into our new home my sister was little. Father Ewing came to bless our house and this was the first time Patti met Father, and my Mother said "Patti, this is Father Ewing"....my baby sister looked at her very seriously and said "That's not my Father, my Father is upstairs sleeping!" Father Ewing always loved my little sister!!!!